Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Illiteracy, thy name is Moo. :(

This slightly mean (but lots nice) woman I know, Chandni, is upto no good again. :( She's put up a list of books that you're supposed to have read by now. She seems to have gobbled the entire fucking list, while I don't score anywhere. I should kill myself. Anyhow, I'm being man enough to admit that I'm not well read, but I want to be. I REALLY DO! So I'm going to post the list of books here myself, the ones in bold being those I've read, while those in italics being ones that in the bookshelf waiting to be read. The ones whose fonts I haven't messed up are the ones I haven't read, nor own. Whew! Here goes. *sob*

Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell
Anna Karenina

Crime and Punishment (hey that's not fair! I am about to start reading The Idiot)
Catch-22

One Hundred Years of Solitude
Wuthering Heights (I'm reading it)
The Silmarillion
Life of Pi : a novel
The Name of the Rose
Don Quixote

Moby Dick
Ulysses
Madame Bovary
The Odyssey

Pride and Prejudice (finally I get to use bold on something)
Jane Eyre
The Tale of Two Cities
The Brothers Karamazov (hasn't anyone heard of Dostoyevsky's 'The Idiot'?
Guns, Germs, and Steel
War and Peace

Vanity Fair
The Time Traveler’s Wife
The Iliad

Emma
The Blind Assassin
The Kite Runner

Mrs. Dalloway
Great Expectations

American Gods
A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius

Atlas Shrugged
Reading Lolita in Tehran : a memoir in books (
Memoirs of a Geisha
Middlesex
Wicked : the life and times of the wicked witch of the West
Quicksilver
The Canterbury Tales

The Historian : a novel
A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man
Love in the Time of Cholera

Brave New World
The Fountainhead
Foucault’s Pendulum
Middlemarch
Frankenstein
The Count of Monte Cristo
Dracula
A Clockwork Orange
Anansi Boys
The Once and Future King

The Grapes of Wrath
The Poisonwood Bible
1984
Angels and Demons
Inferno

The Satanic Verses
Sense and Sensibility
The Picture of Dorian Gray
Mansfield Park
One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest

To the Lighthouse
Tess of the D’Urbervilles
Oliver Twist
Gulliver’s Travels
Les Misérables
The Correction
The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time
Dune
The Prince

The Sound and the Fury
Angela’s Ashes : a memoir
The God of Small Things
A People’s History of the United States : 1492-present
Cryptonomicon
Neverwhere
A Confederacy of Dunces
A Short History of Nearly Everything
Dubliners
The Unbearable Lightness of Being
Beloved
Slaughterhouse Five
The Scarlet Letter
Eats, Shoots and Leaves
The Mists of Avalon
Oryx and Crake
Collapse : how societies choose to fail or succeed
Cloud Atlas

The Confusion
Lolita

Persuasion
Northanger Abbey
The Catcher in the Rye
On the Road
The Hunchback of Notre Dame
Freakonomics : a rogue economist explores the hidden side of everything
Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance : an inquiry into values
The Aeneid
Watership Down
Gravity’s Rainbow

The Hobbit
In Cold Blood : a true account of a multiple murder and its consequences
White Teeth
Treasure Island
David Copperfield
The Three Musketeers

Fuck that's just 13 books. *shoots self* Oh but just for general public welfare, I'm going to list some books that ABSOLUTELY must be in the list as well. Go read.

Half of a Yellow Sun - Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
The Longest Memory - Fred D'Aguiar
Things Fall Apart - Chinua Achebe
Twelve Bar Blues - Patrick Neate
The Book Thief - Marcus Zusack
Gone With the Wind - Margaret Mitchell (WHY wasn't this in the list?)
Chocolat - Joanne Harris
The Diary of Anne Frank
Lord of the Flies - William Golding
The Rape of the Lock - Alexander Pope
A Thousand Splendid Suns - Khaled Hosseini
The Purple Hibiscus - Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
An Old Captivity - Nevil Shute
The Colour Purple - Alice Walker
Little Women - Louisa May Alcott
Shakespeare
The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown
Love Story - Eric Segal
Boogers are my Beat - Dave Barry
Marley and Me - John Grogan
The Godfather - Mario Puzo
Harry. Fucking. Potter.
To Kill A Mockingbird - Harper Lee (HOW did they forget this one? :O)

And I have to go now. I will add some more books later as and when I think of them. For now, I feel better at not being as illiterate as I initially thought. :D Teehee!

13 comments:

Mugger Much said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mugger Much said...

I consider myself tagged.

My list

Homecooked said...

Impressive list!!! When do u plan to start :) Let us know which book u liked so that I can get my hands on it :)

ess said...

I haven't read a lot of those books either. And why are there so few humourous books in that list? Both lists, for that matter.

Over Rated said...

Any list that contains Angels and Demons and does not contain The Godfather is not legitimate in my book. Good you included that.
And I haven't read a lot of the books in both lists. But strangely, I don't feel bad, cause I've read The Godfather!!

And why has everyone read Memoirs of a Geisha? Is it good?


*Today's Moo-J*

q: Which is Moo's favorite Prabhudeva Song?


a: Moo-quabla

*pats own back at having a kick-ass sense of humor*

chandni said...

awwwwwwwww

cmon! half of them I wouldn't recommend to anyone...your second list is actually worth gold so smile!

Its not how much you read but what you read!

and did someone call me mean??

yes?

G@K said...

I guess this is joke no 6 now. 29 more to go...

q: Moo's fav dance number?

A: Moo-ngda!

G@K said...

Does watching a movie count as reading the book. (I know, i know. The answer is no.)

Mugger Much said...

Since we're on the topic:

* Moo's favourite South Indian diety?
Moo-rugan.

* Moo's favourite Bollywood gangster?
Moo-na Bhai.

* Moo's favourite civic hangout?
The Moo-seum.

* Moo's favourite district of Bihar?
Moo-nger.

I'll belt out a few more when I get time.

Mugger Much said...

Of course, Moo's favourite food crop is obviously "Moo-ng Dal".

the white phoenix said...

Here's another one
Moo's fav bollywood song for abt her nymphomaniac neighbour(if there's one)

Padosan apni Moo-rgi ko rakhna sambhal mera Moo-rga hua hai deewana

the white phoenix said...

what kind of money does moo like?
Moo-lah

what will moo hav eif she goes for a sex-change
- A Moo-stache

Mugger Much said...

LOL.

* What would you call Moo if she decided to blow up people professionally for a living?
Moo-jahideen

Ok, best one so far:

* How would you congratulate Moo if she married Obama and dressed up sluttily for the occasion?
Moo-barack Ho.

Thank you thank you thank you. (Bows to adoring crowds)...