Sunday, March 07, 2010

How I got a bruise on my backside...

Ah yes. I've been away from this blog for a while. Stupid, really, for someone who wants to make a living out of writing. I is a fraud, I've realised.

So a lot of things have been happening lately. Details later, since I don't want to jinx things. A major overhaul is in the offing, either way, in the professional and personal front. And no, I'm not getting married.

Panda, Pimpo and I went on a much needed break to Goa. In fact, I think I'm still having post-holiday blues. Whoever wants to come back from the land of free-flowing booze, beaches, fish curry and rice, waves and relaxation, to local trains, office, colleagues, deadlines and routine? The trip was a lot of fun in more ways than one. Pimpo is staying back for the month (lucky bitch) at her aunt's, while Panda and I had to be dragged out of the place kicking and screaming.

But then, this post isn't about that. This post is about how I got a bruise on my butt. On my last afternoon in Goa.

So the three of us were heading to our friend Vijay's shack for our last round of drinks. We'd just finished an awesome lunch of fish curry and rice, garlic butter fish and beer in another shack and were idly strolling on Baga Beach. Suddenly, Pimpo and Panda let out excited squeals and began beckoning me towards them.

Well, they'd spotted a cow on the beach and were orgasming with the possible photo-ops with me and the cow. Ah well, I trundled along to them, while they asked me to pose. But the goddamned cow just wouldn't stop walking. Finally it did, and Pimpo had a bright idea asking me to pose alongside its face. The cow ignored us throughout, so I didn't really think it would mind. Also, for once in my life I was feeling brave about an animal. Maybe the beer had something to do with it.

I sat down near the cow, while Pimpo clicked away. Suddenly, the fucking cow turned its face towards me, making me almost pee in my pants. I got up suddenly and for some obscure reason beyond my realm of understanding, I started running backwards till I tumbled. On my butt. Till this moment, I have no clue why I was so frightened of the cow turning its face towards me.

Needless to say, Pimpo and Panda almost choked with the giggles, punctuated with "WHY were you so scared of your own sister? Hahahahahahahahaha!"

Bitches.

Now excuse me while I go get an ice pack for my posterior.