Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Your daddy should be safely locked up at home when you're driving, because...

1) It's the worst idea to let him sit in the seat next to you.
2) He forgets that you're four years past the legal driving age, and that you've been driving for almost two years now.
3) He will painfully point out every signal, every pothole and every pebble on the road, expecting you to slow down.
4) He wants to be a part of your life's major decisions, like whether you're going to use the dipper at the next junction or simply wait for the guy on the bicycle pass by you smugly.
5) He gets hyper when your car stalls.
6) You aren't supposed to lose your temper through the course of the drive. Even if it means bursting a blood vessel somewhere in the inner depths of your brain.
7) It's always your fault if the car next to you comes too close for comfort.
8) He goes all 'AAAAAAAAARGH WATCH OUTTTTTTTT' when all you did was forget to slow down at a speed breaker. He then yells at you for swerving to the left when he screamed.
9) He tells you to keep your foot off the clutch, after every three minutes.
10) When he's not discussing the general well-being of the clutch, he wants to know if you can clearly see all the cars coming at you in the rearview mirror.
11) He behaves like you're driving with your eyes closed or while you're painting your nails.
12) He clearly becomes the reason you have no fingernails left.
13) He has a problem with the music you play.
14) He keeps his hand on the handbreak throughout the drive, almost as if you might switch the wipers on instead of stepping on the breaks, in an emergency.
15) You can't call the passing biker 'ABEY GANDOOOO' freely and loudly with daddy next to you. Trust me, he will kill you for your colourful vocabulary before killing the biker who broke the mirror.
16) He's a darned good driver himself and you secretly wish you could drive and / or learn to park like him.
16) He sadly knows he's an awesome driver. :(

16 comments:

Idle Wild said...

i totally identify with this one. my dad keeps telling me 'don't hit that man!' while pointing to a tiny speck of a person five miles down the road. like my whole purpose of driving is to become a mass murderer.

ess said...

Dads do that. I guess it's because they've seen us break so many toy cars that they just can't shake the image out of their heads :D

G@K said...

Hahahaha...My dad used to do that, till I started sitting next to him when he drove and complained about every possible thing. Heehee...

Moo said...

@ Idle Wild,
My dad doesn't realise that my error levels INCREASE with his constant doling out of instructions! :) Thanks for visiting. :D

@ ess,

I didn't even break toy cars. Maybe my dad thinks that I haven't had the least bit practise even on toy cars, which is why he's so over cautious! :P

@ G@K,

No point doing that to my dad. He'll simply ignore me. :( :P

Tweety said...

Good one :)

Lamont said...

Good for me my dad cant drive... though he does pass a comment on my driving skills, he enjoys being driven.... so Yippeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sreejit said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sreejit said...

My Dad cant drive, but when I told him that I bought a new car, he still doled out lessons to me, through the telephone.

Dads are like that... they turn themselves and us into a nervous wreck.
Lets see how we fare, when its our turn. :)

And Moo, you ought visit blogs of ppl u tag, atleast to see if they honoured yr tag or not :)

Sakshi said...

Well, lucky you, atleast your dad sits with you when you drive. My parents... don't even sit with me when I drive. i.e. When with either of the parents they drive and you do not.And frankly speaking am ok with that... :)

Gentle Whispers said...

He yells at you for breathing while your driving. Claiming you are therefore not concentrating enough on your driving.

P.S: You have an award waiting. Two actually. Pliss to collect.

Moo said...

@ Tweety,

Thanks thanks. :D Pliss to be visit again! :)

@ Lammy,

Lol...My dad likes the way I drive too...but he still thinks I have too much left to learn. :(

@ Sreejit,

So sorry buddy....Have been neglecting my own blog so terribly, let alone keep track of all my favourite ones. :( I did read your number tag though. Nicely written. Just that I didn't have time to comment. I promise to be a good girl henceforth. :)

@ Sakshi,

Well girlie, it's not that simple. My mum simply refuses to sit next to me when I'm driving. Like I'm some bloody driver. Hmph. Someday she'll know what she missed!

@ Gentle Whispering,

How did I forget to add the breathing bit? :D In fact, he even tells me to stop talking sometimes so I can concentrate. :( Boohoo!!

hotarrowin said...

MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..ok im losing it now..

The Shmoo said...

Haha! Seriously, I do this to my friends when they ride really rash. I wonder why no one ever throws me off :|

Everyone I know drives really well.. but if we drive to someplace for the first time, I'm gonna be way more hyper than your dad. I just won't mind the "vocabulary" ^_^

Loved the post Moo! You should have tweeted that you updated your blog silly cow. That's what Twitter's for.

Time to type 'flants' in the CAPTCHA box :|

Moo said...

@ hotarrowin,

Dude, I know you commented right at the start of the day and all, but there's no need to be so spaced out. :P Keep visiting, and don't you DARE forget the blog link again.

@ The Shmoo,

Well, the difference between you and my dad is that you get hyper only when your friends are rash. My dad is hyper even if I blink when I drive. :P

I'll tweet more often only after you know all the ZooZoo commercials by heart! :D

Rohit said...

Im pretty sure ur dad knows that becoz of him sitting next to u,ur so called error levels have been where they wer earlier rather than increasing....I think his ultimate wish would be to keep the kill count of HIS car to 0....have u given a thought on this ?? huh ??

Kiran said...

Haha .. good one. Thankfully, I do the driving at home and dad doesn't know to drive :D

BTW I arrived here from your twitter feed, where I landed from mihirmodi's twitter feed. And oh yes - I'm adding you to my google reader!